Sunday, November 26, 2006
Last blogged @ 11/26/2006 09:52:00 PM

beeZy bUsy...

On saturday, i went to singapore expo for mega book sales organised by popular.. So they had shuttle service at jurong east popular and not so bad.. scrimp up on my transport... haa... my main purpose is to get medical book.. It was quite crowded though but managed to get a medical book($9.90) and body atlas book($10.90).. Quite cheap la if not normally it would cost about $19.90 onwards for medical books.. went home after that cuz the books are very heavy sia.. Is thick cover book.. Rest a while at home, then went to sheng shiong supermarket... I think i spent less than 30minutes to get the stuffs that i want... As usual, i bought cup n bowl noodles n bit of tidbits and also 12 cans of soft drinks.. That's what i so called new batch of stocks!!.. haa.. i think i am well known mini food mart in my ward sia cuz i will stock up my foods in my locker.. keke... actually plan to go jurong point to get a wedding gift but i was thinking quite late leh and i am a bit tired also...

So today, i went to jurong point... finally get to buy a wedding gift from this christian gift shop.. thanks goodness that is under my budget too.. Then after that went to packet long john silver combo 1 meal... haa.. my suddenly craving.. Then went to print my bankbook account... haiz.. I am that poor after paying this and that la... sianz.. no money to buy christmas gift for my friends liao.. Even though of buying christmas tree to put in my room... but i think i will not crave for it le.. Then my that mother still as usual, keep grumbling to me that she doesnt have money le so hinting me to give her money quickly... so sick of it!! Before i give her money, she went out with her friend somemore... And i remember that i just gave her a $50 on my birthday.. only a week and she asked for it again.. And now she keep telling me that on december there will be bonus given by government and asked me to give her some when i get my salary...!!!! All i can say is, also don know i have it or not!! And she was very sure that i will sure get it! Aiyo... really ar!!! Why cant she let me be a automatic filial child to give her money willingly and generously?? why must she keep on emphasize on it?? It really shows that she dont have trust in me and have not much confidence in me.. She always claimed that she understand me, but i know is only to my basic needs.. Nothing more than it... Haiz, how i wish i could give my love ones money out of love and not because i need to..

During the period of my leave, i went out with my mum on that sunday.. she suddenly tell me that holland village need workers and asked me whether can she work there? Then i question her how bout your current job? She said this part time job is an additional allowance since i don want to give her money/allowance!!!!! WOH!! i tell you, i really felt so angry inside then i ignore her.. Even if she hint me to give her money, i already tried my best to give her as i can and yet she dare to claim that i don want to give her!!! It indeed irritating!!! It seems that i helping out to pay for the utilies bill means nothing to her... She still will claim i didnt help out her... What can i do?? I swallow!... What a family support i have??!!
I can even list out what are her monthly bills are. Handphone of bout $50, house utilites of bout $5o, house phone bill of bout $20 and her grocery stuffs.. Her salary is bout $750.. Then for my dad, his salary is bout $600, BUT, my mum said they used the money to redeem their jewellery one by one so sometime they might left bout 100 to 200 of cash... So to say, my dad works for redemption of jewellery!! Actually my mum salary had more than enough to spend and save but less than 2 weeks she will ask for money from either me or my brother.. Really hor.... Now I am the one who are struggling with financial problem.. Still scrimp on food and buy cup noodles to work and can drinks..

My dad did ask me a few times whether i can manage or not with the utilities bill, but i kept quiet.. The reason is because even if i say i am struggling with all the bills n instalment, what much can they do? Even if i pass back the bill to them to settle, surely by the end of the month they will argue again on the amount to pay and stress me again... Both of their financial planning are really bad!!.. And i always remembered my mum told me off in the past that i anyhow spend my money n yet that time i always give her $250 per month.. So i argue to her back that now you are saying to yourself that you anyhow spend your money.. Is true indeed..

If my mum werent that demanding over monthly allowance and had more support and understanding at home, i wouldnt mind having the struggles.. How i would wish i could relate my feelings now to hEr's who cares and understand me much more than my mum but i afraid i might disturb her.. Even though i may keep mute bout it, it doesnt mean my problem is solve.. Haiz....