Monday, November 13, 2006
Last blogged @ 11/13/2006 02:21:00 PM

My frEedOm stArts From hEre!!...

Happy 21st Birthday to me!!... Yesterday my party was a success one.. All the people i invited were present except angie auntie and auntie laura n cindy cuz they were not feeling well..

I was quite late in reaching home cuz my hairdo finishes at around 1330hrs and took a cab home straight.. When i reached home, one of mum's friend was already here and i quickly went in to my room and dress up... around 2.30pm, my relative start to arrive n followed by griselda n odelia... den followed by mum's a group of friends again.. den followed by my group of khakis.. den mdm lydia came n lastly is yoke n linda...

haa... my 2nd uncle was my guest reporter sia cuz he sat near the door n will inform me when there's friends.. upon seeing mdm lydia, i was very happy n stand at the door receiving her.. she recognize my cousin and had a warm up with her.. den i bring my mum to her and they interact with each other... i remembered her saying" i have grown big le".. haha... den i bring her to my rooms where all my khakis are and just roughly introduce her to them that they are the friends i used to hang out with... and from there, she had a someone to talk to, griselda...

Then i offered 2 jellies to mdm lydia n griselda.. and szeyong took the rest of the jellies amongst themselves... their comments was, it did improve and kids dont lie!! true indeed that odelia dont like the jellies... omg.. den mdm lydia gave her comments was, add less water n recommend to put kiwi seeds.. ok.... but the conversation was so fun and fun lo..

i cut my cake almost 4pm cuz i waited for my guest to arrive... sang birthday songs and cut cake... then immediately griselda n mdm lydia wanted to leave le... both of them have something on too... so they didnt get to eat my cake sia... wanted to hug mdm lydia but didnt manage to cuz she was shy..

Had present opening in front of my khakis... got present of iron, big calculator!! so funny... n i finally got my bible from her... with a CD album inside... as for griselda, she got me a SK jewellery necklace and Christ picture frame.. as for my khakis, they gave me a big hongbao sia.. i really appreciate all the gifts that i had... God gave me all the blessings: loyalty of my khakis, deep care n concern from mdm lydia n griselda, support from all my relatives and many more... praise Lord!

went to kbox with my khakis after the party... but mood suddenly swings to the lowest again.. kept thinking of the things happened between me n her... i had a funny feeling from her.. dunno why.. although i had many blessing from friends n love ones, but it doesnt mean she isnt important anymore.. i just felt we may quite 'drifting'.. i doesnt want to become a nuisance to her either but wanted to continue to keep in touch continous... it seems that when i loved someone too much, it would turned out to be a somehow discontent... but it deosnt mean i am unhappy.. of cos i am very happy and treasured every moment i had with her but i just cant find words to describe my feelings... And that's why i felt a bit down.. for me, love is to for me to hold on and move on....

Dear Lord, u fully understand what and how i felt inside my mind, please guide me.
i would really wanted to hold it firmly of me n mdm lydia fate, but it seems strengthless to hold it firmly.. With your mighty hand, please Lord, to guide me and gave me the wisdom.