Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Last blogged @ 6/23/2010 04:50:00 PM

New working place, new transition to recovery process.....

1) New working place..

I will be officially working in Khoo Tect Puat Hospital starting from this friday. Our inpatient ward will be opened on the June 28 together with the A&E department. I feel kind of anxious because many things are new and I wonder how things will turn out. But I am excited to work with 2 familiar faces as they are my new Nursing officer. I know them personally. I pray that i can perform well and work well with them.

2) New transition...

I have been feeling emotional turmoil as i called it. All the ups ups down down... I am quite tired of it because I have realized my depressed mood not only affected me but people around me. Especially God, Ben, cell mates and friends. I been out of norm for the past few months ever since i started work in ward 4 with Sister M.G. I grumbles, complaint, non-chalant, gossips, sian and etc... much most of the time. Been trying to find out what is the cause or source but failed.

Until yesterday, i was scheduled day off. Went to Jurong library with much enthusiaism that I want to read some christian books about emotional freedom or stuffs like that... because i told God that i really want to move on and change. And thanks God that i pick about 6 books. And finally chose 4 books to loan. And i tell you it was fantastic!! First, i finished reading a book called "Your Spiritual Personally" which talks about the SCPM. I learnt alot from the book. And now i just finished another book called "the 6 steps tp emotional freedom". From this book, God reveal to me about that Sister M is the source of my anger that leads to my resentment, bitterness, hatred and hostility. As i read the book, i prayed along at the same time. I tears and i repent. I felt more released. I now know why i am behaving such ways and i am ready for change. Relying on God to do the complicated work in my heart and myself working hard to identify and let go.

Now my heart is no longer that numb. I can feel i am coming to my usual norm. I am more happier. I pray that i will continue to move on and overcome it.

3) Recover process..

yes, i am in the recovery process. :)